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Archive for May, 2007

Shoes and Penises

Should you order shoes online based on penis size?

I seem to be blogging so much about penises these days. Perhaps, it’s penis-envy; perhaps, it’s lack of exposure to one. No matter what the reason, though, I might as well blog about something useful while I’m at it.

There’s been lots of talk going on about penis size being correlated to shoe size. In fact, not only is there talk about the relationship, there’s even a formula for it. The equation, it is said, is as follows: (Your Shoe Size + 5) / 2

Whether real or not, this is a very fascinating idea. Consider the following chart:

Shoe
Sizes
Europe 35 35½ 36 37 37½ 38 38½ 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46½ 48½ Europe
Japan 21.5 22 22.5 23 23.5 24 24.5 25 25.5 26 26.5 27.5 28.5 29.5 30.5 31.5 Japan
Korean (mm.) 89- 101 108 114 121 127 133 140 148 156 174 184 216 244 264 280+ Korean
U.K. 3 4 5 6 7 8 10½ 11½ 13 U.K.
U.S. 4 5 6 7 8 9 10½ 11½ 12½ 14 U.S.
Inches 9 91/8 93/8 95/8 97/8 10 101/8 10¼ 10½ 10¾ 11 11¼ 11½ In.
Centimeters 22.8 23.1 23.5 23.8 24.1 24.5 24.8 25.1 25.4 25.7 26 26.7 27.3 27.9 28.6 29.2 Cm.
Mondopoint 89- 101 108 114 121 127 133 140 148 156 174 184 216 244 264 280+ Mondopt.
Penis
Size
Inches 3.5- 4.0 4.25 4.5 4.75 5.0 5.25 5.5 5.85 6.15 6.85 7.25 8.5 9.6 10.4 11+ Inches
Centimeters 8.9- 10.2 10.8 11.4 12.1 12.7 13.3 14 14.0 15.6 17.4 18.4 21.6 24.4 26.4 28+ Cm.

Before you place an order for new sneakers, however, please note that in the British Journal of Urology, the chart has been denounced as a hoax. A medical study had been conducted, comparing the vital statistics of 104 male Londoners. It was found that there is no statistically significant correlation between shoe size and penile dimensions.

Interestingly, the accuracy of the chart is backed by only one argument: the chart must be true because it makes sense. Men need larger feet than penises. If they had larger penises and smaller feet, they would keep tipping forward.

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