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Archive for January, 2007

It’s a common Filipino belief that a pregnant woman can have a say in how her child will turn out as an adult simply by carefully selecting what she eats. For example, when a child is dark-skinned, people (especially old crones and barrio-living ones) immediately assume the mother loved to eat chocolate porridge, chocolate, or other dark-colored food during her pregnancy.

Her: Your little girl is so smart. What did you eat when you were expecting?

Me: Friend egg, corned beef, and penis.

Her: (incredulously] Really? Which animal’s penis?

Me: My husband’s.

Taut silence.

Me: (in an attempt to break the strained silence) I’ve also been told I’m such a chatterbox because when my mom was pregnant, not a week would go by when she doesn’t eat pig’s vagina.

Again, taut silence, and this time, even I had to admit the less words I say, the better.

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